There are so many books, experts, studies, and “gut feelings” that tell you about body language and what to do with your eyes at your next business meeting. As well as how to look at someone during that meeting.
You hear “Don’t break eye contact because _______” and “Don’t blink too much because _______”.
Do you look at, or observe, someone differently: In a meeting than you do at Church? At the mall than at work? On a date than when ordering lunch?
I’m gonna break it down so it’s very easy to understand and way too simple to forget what to do with your eyes at your next business meeting…
There are 3 types of “gazes” you use out in the wild when you’re interacting with others. The Power Gaze – The Social Gaze – and The Intimate Gaze.
The Power Gaze: This gaze is used in meetings, negotiations, and business discussions. The eyes look at the opposite face in 2 specific places. The eyes and the lower forehead. Your brain is trying to decipher what those areas may be transmitting nonverbally.
You’ll notice this the next time you’re in a meeting or talking to someone in a business setting. Keep in mind, you’re doing it too.
The Social Gaze: This gaze darts between the eyes and mouth of the opposite face. There will be forehead glances as well, but mostly the mouth and eyes.
You’ll start noticing people looking at you like this. You’ll also notice you’re doing it to friends, family, colleagues, and people at you meet at parties or when talking to another parent as you both wait on your children to show up after an event or something.
If you begin noticing the Social Gaze in a business meeting, that suggests the person feels good about you and has let their guard down some and has possibly relaxed a little bit.
The Intimate Gaze: This is what you’ll see and do if you’re talking to your spouse or someone you’re dating. The eyes dart between the eyes and the chest of the opposite face. Notice I said “chest” not “breast”. There’s a big difference. There won’t any starring at the chest, just the darting.
If you start seeing this in a meeting, that might not be good. Intimate Gazing suggests the person may have interests other than business. It doesn’t mean that every time, that’s why I say “suggests”. However, I’d watch my step.
So there you have it. Now you know where to look, and you know where the other person should be looking.
If you’re interested in learning more about business meetings and the body language that happens in them, you want download “Inside My Body Language Briefcase – The 5 Tools No One Else In The Business Meeting Will Have”. It’s free, 30 pages, awesome graphics, and you can get through it very quickly and understand it very easily.